Out with the old, in with the new....

I was reading about "habits" today. Habits can be either strengthened or broken. I'm sure we all know which habits we have that we'd like to change or break. They don't only have to be physical bad habits, like having to chow down on that big bag of popcorn followed by a giant-sized Goobers at the movies, but they can be bad habits of your thoughts. It seems those bad thought habits can, oftentimes, be more dangerous than the physical type. What is she talking about, you say?

Well, a bad habit of thought for me is thinking that I'm unorganized and unfocused. Because I keep reaffirming that to myself, I find that my life is somewhat overwhelming.

It seems when we think bad things about ourselves and about others they become true. Even if they really aren't true they become that way in our minds making it hard to see past what we have manifested. In other words, as in my case, I'm probably not really that unorganized or unfocused, as I'm able to put these words together (and I think they make a little sense), I have dinner for my husband most evenings (a little take out never hurts), I take good care of my pets and I think I'm a good friend, mother and sister, but by reaffirming those negative thoughts over and over to myself chaos seems to follow me. My desk is a cluttered mess, my kitchen needs straightening, projects need completing, my filing system is here, there, and everywhere, etc., etc., etc.

The same holds true for how we view others in our lives. If we always focus on characteristics of our family and friends that may not be, in our eyes anyway, the best, they become the person we have imagined them to be. For instance, let's say you have a friend or someone in your family who quite often looks to you for help. If you focus on the fact that they can't seem to do anything on their own...that they are helpless...and you keep reaffirming that in your thinking then they become a burden to you, someone who you always have to help and do for. Now if you focus on the things they DO get done and the successes they have, you no longer feel like they are such a burden when they do need your help (I know this first-hand because I have a husband...hi honey!)

So by focusing on the good parts of yourself or others around, you are really enhancing your own life and development. It's a win, win situation. You raise up yourself and them. It's a wonderful thing!

So my task for today is:

Reflect on how you thought of someone today who may have "bugged" you and decide how you can change your thinking about that person to raise up their and your own lives. Try to make this kind of positive and affirming thinking a new habit! Good Luck!

"Oh my oh my..."

I only got a chance to watch a portion of the "A New Earth" class last night but one thing they did touch upon which rang clear to me had to do with complaining. I'm not sure if there is a bigger complainer than me...especially in my own head. I whine about things in my thoughts all the day long. Sometimes it gets to the point where I don't even want to spend time with me!

What they talked about last night was that there are two different types of complaining. One type is meant to bring about positive change in a situation or other person. The example they used was, "My soup is cold." That complaint, in most restaurants, will prompt the wait person to bring your soup back into the kitchen to spit in it and warm it through before returning it to you for your enjoyment.

The other kind of complaining is the kind that you do when you are looking for agreement or consolation from your inner self or from someone around you. An example of this is, "I have no time to get anything done" or "there's just not enough time in the day." Those are my favorites. When I say them I'm looking for an, "Oh poor you" or even the response of, "You don't work all day, what do you do that keeps you so busy." Of course them's fightin' words and maybe that's what I was looking for also.

The problem with the second type of complaint is that it causes no positive change. It doesn't cause you to do less or take a nap or get take-out that night. It just annoys your well-being.

So my question is three-fold:

How much do you complain in a day, does it affect any positive change and does it play any part in coloring your day or life?